Please...

6 word prayer...

"please don't let me be sick."


09 February 2012
Lad Prao Soi 1

Empake

Once again, I am on packing mode. And for a change, I listened to this song while packing my luggage.

Packing never felt more lonely.

I'm never doing this again.


10:50pm
02 Feb, 2012
Thursday
Chiang Ma

Catharsis #6 : Heartbreak

Someone broke my heart two years ago.
Of all the men that I've met, he broke my heart the most.
He left without even saying goodbye.
He left just like that.

But I know that he is fine, wherever he is.
Because I saw him, in my dreams.
He looked happy and well.
He waved at me and smiled.

I am happy too.
But I can't help but shed a tear when I have thoughts of him.
I see him in little things.
I feel him as if he never left.

I know that he loves me still.
Because he left me...
Not because he wanted to.
It's just that he had to.

I guess this is the kind of heartbreak that will never go away.
Never. Ever.
But this is also the heartbreak that I will always welcome.
These are the tears that will never leave my eyes.

Because I will always welcome thoughts of him.
I want to always remember.
I never will forget.
Because he is my father.

I miss you, daddy!


Jan 23, 2012
Daddy's second year death anniversary

Borrowed moves

Just shoot for the stars if it feels right
Then aim for my heart, if you feel like
And take me away
And make it okay


21 January 2012
I love you, sabado
Lad Prao Soi 1

Timba

My bucket list:

1. Learn how to swim
2. Visit Egypt
3. Visit Mt Vesuvius
4. Visit ALL the provinces of the Philippines
5. Sing in a lounge bar
6. Dive
7. Visit Taj Mahal

My bucket list... For now...


5:35pm
13 January 2012, Friday
Cafe Mo
Teacher's Village, QC

2012

New year
New chapters
New pages

Moving on
Forgetting
Forgiving

Sunshines
Fresh
Rainbows

Changes
Endings
Beginnings

Refurbish
Revamp
Rebirth

Six

Missing you, and what could've been.


6 word poetry
6:25pm
11 December 2011
Sunday
My shoebox

Be careful what you wish for

I've always wanted to travel since I was a child.

And I got this wish.

My job requires me to travel at least once per month. Sometimes, I get back from the airport, switch luggages, and leave the next morning.

My favorite tambayan (hang out place) lately is yes, you've guessed it right... The airport.

I am literally living in a suitcase. ABB as one friend would say... Ang Bahay ay ang Bag (my house is my luggage).

I should be happy and thankful that I get to travel, that I get to see a lot of places, meet a lot of people and taste lots of unique food from all over. But i just get so tired. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining. I just wish I have more time to rest and settle down. To gather some moss.



9:40pm
05 December 2011
Monday
Butuan City

Fate

my six words...

We meet again... maybe it's destiny.


10:10pm
20 Nov 2011
Sunday
Ladprao

But I think I know you

But I think I know you

I know that you don’t smoke
I know which countries you have been to
I know you speak some languages
I know that you drive
I know you write letters
I know that you think you can dance… even if you can’t
I know that you like to read
Because I have met you.

I know that you know me, too
You know what records I listen to
And you know how I sleep, and that sometimes, I find it hard to sleep
I know that you know that I will walk your way… as long as I’m with you
And by now, you have to know…
That I don’t fall that easily… not at all.

*this is inspired by Lisa Hannigan's song (I Don't Know)

06:45pm
14 November 2011
Monday
My Shoebox, Gotham

The Familiar

Sometimes, things are better...

Nostalgic, rather than current

Old, rather than futuristic

Rustic, rather than polished

Stained, rather than spotless

Aged and used, rather than brand new

Natural, rather than artificial

Familiar, rather than cutting-edge

Such is the 70s Bistro in Quezon City.

It was once a haven for UP students, activists, NGO workers, artists, poets, musicians, and the "unpolished". It can be best described as musty, stuffy, old, dark, dirty... in short, "dugyot". But this is where it gets its charm and character.

Now that it's been renovated and cleaned and polished... it suddenly became one of those bars, not the Bistro we used to love.

Sad. Sad. Sad.



7:25pm
21 October 2011
Friday
Kyusi

Wish

6 word-wishes

maybe it's time for a sabbatical

i need a blue sky holiday

i badly need some me time



4:45pm
15 October
Saturday
Cablelandia

Mansanas

iEve

iBite

iWantMore

iBuy

iHappy


9:40pm
09 October
Sunday
Fairview
(back in my shoebox after 3 weeks of travel)

aftertaste

i sometimes liken love to wine... it will make you giddy, happy, fuzzy.

too little, and you will find yourself craving for more. too much and you might find yourself losing time, missing out or having a really bad hangover.

what i like most about wine is that it has a very distinct aftertaste. it can either be bitter, persistent, short, sweet, smooth, or even non-existent.

and like wine... love will leave a distinct aftertaste -- bitter or sweet -- which will depend on how you savor the love that you had.

*inspiration for this piece is Damien Rice's Cannonball... "there's a little bit of your taste in my mouth"... *


06:25 om
20 Aug 2011
Tuesday
Cablelandia

High

I'm on a high today. Since this morning, until this time at night (10pm).

And i am attributing this to the fact that i did Zumba this morning for 15 minutes. Hence, the upbeat mode.

So starting tomorrow, i vow to do my morning exercises, for at least 10 minutes daily.

And as i write that resolve, i've finished the 20th piece of Flat Tops (from tindahan ni Aling Nena) for the day.

Hmmm... come to think of it, maybe it was Flat Tops and not Zumba after all.

Sigh.


10:05pm
18 Aug 2011
Thursday
Lad Prao Soi 1



photo credit: internet

be careful what you wish for

a lot of people have cautioned me... "be careful what you wish for"... because it just might come true.

for some reason, i don't fully understand why we have to be cautious in hoping for thing we want to have, or events we want to happen. we WANT it to happen, that's why we wish for it.

and from what i know, human beings will only want good things... happy things... things and events which will satisfy our insatiable wants and needs. so why worry? why be cautious? just don't wish for too much drama.

i say... wish for the star, dream big, aim high.

and oh... i was granted one wish... will be based in the Philippines for a couple of months. sweet! thanks for the pixies, Universe :)


4:25pm
24 July 2011
Sunday
Chiang Mai, Thailand

Saturday Night Fever

Satellite tv

Wifi connection

Skype with Summer and Red

Moo yang and sticky rice

Mangosteen

Sketching session



9:40pm
09 July 2011
Saturday
Lad Prao Soi 1

where?

6 word entry:

"my life: neither here nor there"



9:05pm
tues
21 June 2011
my shoebox
gotham

Should I cry when you die?

*another free-writing exercise. i'm still deciding if this is a poem, or a simple blog entry. heniweys...*


Should I cry when you die?

Should I cry
When you die?

Should I shed tears...
Real tears?

When all we had was fleeting...
Temporal and almost imaginary

Like a dream
That I desperately want to recall
As soon as I open my eyes

I think I felt your lips touch mine
But somehow I cannot trust my memory

Did I just want it bad enough
To actually happen

That the crevices in my brain
Decided to store this picture
As part of my reality

When does reality end...
And when does imagination begin?

So when you die
Should I grieve like we had a connection?

Or should I just feign indifference
And forget how in my memory
I felt the warmth of your breath
Against my face

Should I grieve for that fleeting moment
When I felt your heartbeat against my chest

When during that particular moment in time...
I felt that there is an 'us'

Maybe it was all in my head
So if grieve I must
It must be like that kiss
Fleeting, temporal, almost imaginary

Is it just Fata morgana?
They say that when you look into the horizon long enough
You will see images

But is this just that?
Fata Morgana
To drown me
And lure me to my own death?

Reality is relative they say.
Maybe in the future
Reality would prove me wrong

Much like the fact
That Pluto is not a planet
Or that there are 4 states of matter
Or that the earth is round

Maybe someday
Time would finally prove
That there was an 'us'

Yes
I think I will cry
When you die

I will shed real tears
For that version of reality
Which I remembered

It's my reality
My tears
So I will cry
When you die


16 June 2011
1:15am
Thursday
Gotham

37

37 is a special number for me.

i am now 37 years old.

it is said that 37 is the commonly accepted average core body temperature (taken internally) -- 37.0 °C. this must mean something good, right? not too hot, not too cold... just right... exactly what Goldilocks thought of Baby Bear's porridge... it's right for the eating.

it is also said that there are 37 holes in the mouthpiece of the old telephone unit, just the right number for the person at the other end to hear you speak. there are also 37 bars in the digits of a digital watch, just enough for us to tell the time.

so this year must be just that for me... JUST RIGHT.

just right -- to let go of the old and make way for the new.

just right -- to feel the highs as well as the lows.

just right -- to see the light, without being blinded.

just right -- to appreciate the rainbow after a heavy downpour

just right -- to feel comfortable in the dark, while waiting for that faint flicker of light

just right -- to prepare for the worst, while hoping for the best

just right -- to taste the bitter, to appreciate the sweetness of life

just right -- to know and pursue battles which i can win, and walk away from those that i can't

just right -- to take on big challenges, while not forgetting life simple pleasures

just right -- to enjoy solitude, while not being too comfortable with it

just right -- to play fair.. love light... live life.

thank you for being part of my life for the past 36 years.

this day starts another fabulous year for me. i invite you to join my journey :)