So there they were, inside a small translucent plastic container, staring at me, perhaps with a feeling of anxiety due to our sudden separation. I’ve nursed them for more than 4 years now, carefully choosing what I eat, how much I drink. Then suddenly, I was overwhelmed with a feeling of both sadness and ecstasy. Finally, they were liberated, now out in the world for everyone to see. Most people just can’t appreciate things unless they see it, you see. Now, everyone can see them, and they will be the testament of my personal struggle for the past years.
I’m not talking about babies or whatever, I’m talking about my gallstones, my precious stones. I was diagnosed by my Internist some years ago. Due to the prodding of a doctor friend, who I incidentally lost contact with already, I visited my internist. The doctor-friend told me, the symptoms I was experiencing (colic-like pains, feeling of nausea, stabbing pains in my upper abdomen) were signs of gallstones. What the heck, just to prove him that he was wrong, and that internal medicine was not his forte (we were already falling apart during those times), I went to an internist, underwent ultrasound, and viola!... there they were! 2 small stones in my gallbladder. My twins!
Come to think of it, I never got to thank the doctor-friend. Well, life was not a bed of roses with him, so I guess I just deserved this bit of information about my gallstones, free consultation if you may say. They say that people come into your life for a reason, maybe this is his – to tell me that I have gallstones. That suits me well, he has at least saved me from future medical incidents, like this condition where the gallstones get stuck in the opening of your gallbladder, and gets really really swollen and infected, making you puke like hell, and makes your eyes and skin turn yellow. I cant remember the medical term, I’m not very good at that.
Anyways, back to my babies. So for more than 4 years, I have convinced myself that my precious stones need not be extracted out, after all, I am a mature and responsible individual, I can control what I eat and drink, cant I? Well, it turned out I was partly successful – I tried to stay away from oily food (bye bye sisig, liempo, chicharon and bulalo). But what I cant give up is the fermented malt, which is found in San Miguel’s primary product, sigh.
So years after years, I tried going to different Internists (doctors specializing on Internal Medicine), hoping to find a single doctor who will give me a quick fix. Something like an elixir I could drink, and the precious stones would miraculously disappear, or at least passed through some bodily excretions. But to no avail! They were all involved in this conspiracy, telling me that I should have it removed surgically, especially that my attacks were getting more frequent – average of 2 attacks per month. And I cant tell you how it feels to have an attack. Its like giving birth (I think), only much worse (this theory I have to prove yet. I’ll get back to you after I experience giving birth hehehe). Because in giving birth, you know that you will be bringing to life someone. During a gallstone attack, all I can see are my precious stones dancing away and doing body slam with each other, soaking in the green bile they love so much. Yuck!
But surgery? No way! I have not been confined in a hospital, not once in my life. And this one experience, I can easily pass up, no thanks!
But then, I think the natural course of things is that when things have to go, they really have to go. I have this project outside the Philippines, which will necessitate me to be away for 6 long months. And this country that I’m going to, man, they have REALLY good food, and they love to see their food swimming either in oil, chili or curry. So, instead of experiencing my gallstones freak out in a really wild party, I decided to go for the surgery.
I went to FEU, it was the nearest to my house. Found a decent-looking doctor. Found that he was a PGH graduate. I heaved a sigh of relief after seeing that. Not that I’m too loyal and impressed with UP grads, its just that I know how UP grads think of themselves – they think of themselves as the best in their field (this might be purely perception, may I remind you). This surgeon might be someone who will never allow failure in whatever he does.
But I was not satisfied with the diploma I saw hanging in his clinic, I surfed information about him. I did not get much except that he really is a PGH graduate, a member of this medical fraternity in UP Manila, and had his braces late in life (hahaha! I saw this info in one of his batchmates’ blogspot. Tsk tsk, the information you can surf in the web).
Being the hypochondriac that I am, I also surfed about the procedure that I will be undergoing – Laparoscopic Cholecystectomy or lap chole. As opposed to the open chole, where they will slice you up, this procedure is less invasive. The surgeons will just make 4 small slits, which is fine with me. Since I am a keloid former, I do not want to have 4 blackened thick scars on my stomach! Accuse me of vanity, but I’m sure you’ll make the same choice given my situation. And so I discussed this with my surgeon, asking him about keloids and injury to the common bile duct. I felt powerful with the new information that I have.
So in February 10, I went to the hospital, had several tests, and was finally ready for operation the following day. I can still vividly picture it in my mind… at 1:30pm, the nurse and the orderly went to my room and asked me to lie down in the bed with wheels. The nurse injected (very painfully) a sedative, hoping to calm my nerves. Oh, I became calm alright, the fuzzy feeling was soooo perfect, like how you will feel after downing 4 or 5 bottles of beer.
I got into the OR, where Phil Collins was blazing from the speakers. Fine with me, I even sang a few lines. Then I noticed this really cute doctor, was not sure if he was already a surgeon, he looked too young to be one. Maybe a Resident Doctor of Surgery, I decided. Maybe he noticed that I was not getting sleepy at all. He asked me a few friendly questions, and finally asked me if I’m not sleepy, and that it’s all right if I rest and sleep. I did not bother to inform him that I’m used to keeping my eyes wide open even after several bottles of beer. I looked at the wall clock, I saw that it was already 3pm! It has been 1 ½ hours after I had the sedative, and I’m still awake!
Finally, after a few minutes, they might have decided to give up on the hopes that the sedatives would wear me down (hah! I succeeded in staying awake, thanks to San Mig Light!), they injected through my IV this liquid, which I guessed was the anesthesia. They also covered my mouth with the oxygen mask. The chemical odor from the mask was not pleasant. Cant remember how it smells like, but I know I’ve handled it in my Chem 16 class. Or maybe it was Ether from Bio 11? No, that was for frogs.
After more than 2 hours of operation, and 3 hours in the recovery room, I was wheeled into my room around 9pm. I distinctly remember the nurse telling my mom that I can eat anything, no more fasting. I am allowed to have full meals! HAHAHA! Liberation! Freedom! Kalayaan! I will finally be reunited with the evils of the food kingdom – fats and oil.
I woke up midnight, with a very uncomfortable feeling – a strange pressure in my stomach, hurting wounds, and bruised internal organs (I think). But when I looked over my side table, I found the plastic container with my precious stones. There were not 2 stones, there were around 20 stones! I have cared for them too much, that they multiplied tenfolds! And maybe like what mothers feel after giving birth, I knew the pain that I feel was well worth it. My precious stones’ liberation is freedom for me as well. Goodbye low fat meals, hello porky pig!
6:43pm
14 February 2006
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment