free writing

it's a sunday, and i dedided to write anything and everything that comes to mind. no editing whatsoever. except for the typographical editing that needs to be done, lest i be accused of being stupid.

my former boss used to tell us that the best form of writing exercise (and also for exercising you mind) is by doing free-writing, like what i'm doing now. he said, "just write, about anything that comes to mind. don't think about how it will sound, or if it's even comprehesible. just write!"

he's a really brilliant lawyer and writer and speaker, so i guess he must have done this in the past. so i'm doing it now. not because i want to be like him, nor i want to surpass all his legal credentials. i just want to write... because... i want to write about things which are not really coherent, or may not make sense, or may just sound plain crazy to you.

so what do i want to discuss first... ah yes, about cyber stalking.

a couple of months ago, i was chatting with a high school friend who's based in the US. i asked him what he was doing. he said that he's waiting for his wife to pick him up from his workplace. while waiting for her, he's cyber stalking all his past flames. he said that he has found some really interesting info (and photos, too) of his past loves/interests/flames.

that's what i've done for the past hour, or should i say, hours. i've searched the internet (using almost all search enginges, and all possible search techniques) to find all information about my latest obsession (don't worry, i'll discuss this topic next). i found out some juicy bits of information about him and his family. i won't say that i was happy of what i've learned. i think i was more scared of my capacity to stalk someone, albeit only cyberwise (is that even a word?). i'm beginning to scare myself! Herlich, this is your fault! you gave me really crazy ideas.

anyways, this guy that i'm stalking... he doesn't really fit the usual profile of guys that i like. this guy is older, much older (ok, ok.... waaaayyyy older) than the guys i've dated. he's mature, funny, smart, successful, dignified, soft-spoken, composed, accomplished and really really nice.

you remember the movie, Autumn in New York? he reminds me so much of Richard Gere, i swear, he's so cute. he actually looks younger than his real age. he looks 10 years younger than he really is. to you (let's call him Richard), sir Richard... if you read this, it only means that you like me enough to google my name and read by blog. uyyy, like mo din ako no? stalker ka din! hehehe.

don't worry, people, i passed the "half-his-age-plus-seven" rule. they say that in order to have a meaningful relationship with someone older, you must not be less than "half-his-age-plus-seven".

heniways, i'm so excited to read this entry. i wonder if it'll make sense. i'm sure most of you will email or text or call me and tell me that i'm crazy. but i don't care. i'm Winona. she got Richard. she stole from a store. she served time (she did, right?). she's a branded a kleptomaniac. but she's still famous! life is unfair!


10:59 pm
September 28, Sunday
Santiago City, Isabela

Choices… choices

Inspired by my previous blog enty, Boylet (link: http://bampira-ako.blogspot.com/2006/02/boylet.html), I have been mulling about this question lately…

“Would I rather date/go into a relationship with a boylet (say, a guy 10 years my junior), or have a may-december love affair with a mature and much older guy (15 or more years my senior?”

Now, I am actually leaning more on the latter choice.

Ikaw, I want to know your thoughts…


02:10 pm
17 September 2008
Holiday Inn
Clark, Pampanga

The Net

You remember this movie…The Net?

This 1995 movie, which stars Sandra Bullock (I love her!) illustrates the types of problems that can come up if a person’s private information falls into the wrong hands. Angela Bennett (Bullock) fell victim to identity theft as her personal information and key identity data were stolen and used in order to exchange her identity with another.

Although the plot of this movie seems fantastic and far-fetched, identity theft in the internet is a serious and common problem that occurs frequently in real life.

I had 2 Indian colleagues (1 is an awarded independent film maker, and the other one is a very respected grassroots activist) who had their email accounts spammed. They were both using yahoo accounts for several years. A couple of months ago, I received separate email messages from both their addresses confessing that they are sex addicts. Of course, it turned out to be a case of email hacking.

Another pinay friend couldn’t access her email account after her break up with her most recent ex. We firmly believe that the good-for-nothing-jerk has his dirty hands involved in this freak accident.

That is why yesterday, I was in a state of shock when both my yahoo accounts could not be accessed! I tried punching in my password several times, but to no avail!

I wanted to cry! My heart stopped beating. My mind was racing, trying to recall all the important document and information stored in my email accounts. Everything is there – from passwords, to birthdays, to important personal documents, work outputs, contact details of friends, heck… even secret stories and juicy gossip and intrigues.

I tried the last solution that I could think of… I shut down my laptop and waited for 5 minutes, then turned it on again.

As the familiar windows OS display was flashing in my screen, I think I’ve called on all the saints that I knew of. I was begging them to save my email account. That was one of the very few times that I prayed that hard.

And I guess I must have done something good in my childhood, because yahoo finally accepted my password! Jos lord! Salamat ng marami!

This made me think again how our lives (well, at least mine) are so dependent on the virtual space we call the Internet. I remember 15 years ago, this was not the case at all. We can still get in touch with our friends just by landline phonecalls or even messages thru the pager, or even the good ol’ snail mail.

We can work for 8 hours a day even without an internet. Now I feel paralyzed at work without checking my mails.

We have let the Internet take over our lives. Children play internet and computer games instead of the traditional taguan and tumbang preso. Friends send virtual messages and hugs through facebook, yahoo and friendster, instead of talking over coffee. Family members write to each other using the electronic mail, and thus fail to memorize the strokes of their relatives’ handwriting.

Hay… we are really living in a virtual world.

Sometimes, I think of what might happen if the Internet collapses. Is there no end to the vastness of this virtual space? How much more gigabytes of information can it hold? Is there a possibility that someday, it will just explode like a big balloon? What happens to all those information?


To end this problematic blog entry, I would like to quote Angela Bennett:
“Our whole world is sitting there on a computer. It's in the computer, everything: your, your DMV records, your, your social security, your credit cards, your medical records. It's all right there. Everyone is stored in there. It's like this little electronic shadow on each and everyone of us, just, just begging for someone to screw with, and you know what? They've done it to me, and you know what? They're gonna do it to you.”

Hala… kaya ingat!


08:55pm
11 September 2008
Santiago City, Isabela

Blue’s Clues

I remember years ago that I used to watch this very amusing children’s show on ABC 5. It’s called Blue’s Clues. It’s a children's show about a dog named Blue. The series follows Blue through her everyday life, providing small children with fun and education.


The game of Blue's Clues begins near the beginning of the episode, when the Steve asks Blue a question. Blue responds by jumping at the screen and marking it with a blue pawprint, which is a sign that Blue wants to answer Steve’s question by playing Blue's Clues. Steve, with the help of the audience (who are constantly spoken to and asked questions by Steve), then searches the house for Blue's 3 clues. Along the way, Steve speaks with other residents of the house, often characters based on inanimate objects such as a side-table drawer, a salt shaker, and a mailbox. After all three have been found, Steve sits in his "thinking chair" and puts the 3 clues together, using a pen and the handy-dandy notebook, to form a central image. This image is the answer to Steve’s original question, which goes along the lines of "What does Blue want to do today?"


From 1996 to 2002, Blue's owner was Steve, a non-animated character played by Steven Burns. When Burns chose to leave the show, the character Steve went off to college and his younger brother Joe (played by Donovan Patton) moved in to take care of Blue.

A lot of kids love this show. And one of these kids is Summer, my lovely 5-year old niece. Last month, while we were watching re-runs of the show (I heard they stopped airing already), she was also doodling and drawing on her writing pad, which is basically several pieces of scratch bond paper stapled together to look like a drawing pad.

In the middle of the Blue’s Clues episode, she said, “Tita, di ba we should use scratch paper to save trees? Why is Steve and Joe not using the back page of their handy dandy notebook?”.

I felt proud that this little girl knew about loving the environment. It felt really good knowing that we’ve influenced her to think critically. So I told her to write to Steve and Joe. And below is her letter:

“dear Steve and Joe,

I’m always watching Blues clues and I noticed that you are not using the back page of your handy dandy notebook. Please write at the back to save paper.

Love, Summer”


She told me to send it to Steve and Joe. But before giving me her scratch pad paper, she told me, “Maybe they don’t know who I am.”. But I told her that it’s fine. She should just introduce herself.

I was surfing the net for the email address of the producers of Blue’s Clues. But since they’re off the air already, I can’t find any email address. Although the show’s off the air already, we still would like to send it to Nickolodeon.

Can anyone help Summer deliver her letter? Salamat!



10:15pm
06 September 2008
Santiago City, Isabela

Da-wow!

I’ve told a lot of friends that next to Baguio City, Davao City is my next favorite city. If there was a place that I would like to relocate to, it would be this city.

I like Davao’s vibe.

I love kinilaw, mangosteen, pomelo and lechon. All these things are best found in Davao.

If you want a lazy afternoon at the beach, you can go to Samal Island and the other nearby resorts. If you miss the morning mountain breeze, mount Apo is very near. Eden’s Nature Park is actually the best place to go to.

There are a lot of local artists and cultural groups. On the other hand, coffee shops, restos and gimik places abound.

There are 5 star hotels and posh malls. But a few minutes away from downtown, you can still see very rural community settings.

Davao is a contradiction.

Davao is a rainbow of different colors.

It’s been more than 3 years since my last visit to davao.

And after visiting it again, I can say that Davao is really Da-wow!


04:45 pm
03 September 2008
Santiago City